it's hard to know how to end this. after nearly 8 months doodling around the globe and back, i'm not sure what the right finale to the blog would be. so, here are some final thoughts (me and jerry springer, man!).

THE TALLY

flights taken: 22

on my 21st flight of this trip (antalya, turkey to london), i decided to stand up and change rows during takeoff. i might be the most conscious seatbelt-wearer in the world (a close second to my mother, simon the safety bear), but for some reason i had it in my little head that takeoff was the time to change seats. i was scolded by the flight attendant, who clearly thought i was new to this whole flying thing. sadly, she was wrong, i just had a temporary bout of dumbassedness.

countries visited: 10 (+ 2 countries that involved sleepovers only)

trips to the emergency room: 1

my carbon footprint: priceless

actually, it isn't priceless, there's just a debate as to how to calculate the cost.
my flights, in kilometres:

7586 + 594 + 821 + 1579 + 8344 + 3837 + 1668 + 3594 + 333 + 6150 + 2300 + 745 + 330 + 2419 + 2419 + 745 + 2162 + 6303 + 10572 + 2796 + 2926 + 7586
= 75,809

apparently that's 14.4 tons of co2 that i pumped into the air at high altitudes, or about $85,307 in guilt.

HOW WAS YOUR TRIP?

yeah, good, thanks.
ummmmmm. how was yours?

HOW DOES IT FEEL TO BE BACK?

it's going ok. it's a bit weird, but i'm settling in slowly and kinda getting used to it. it's been nice to see people.

i've been back for exactly a month today, and have had 2 meltdowns so far: the first was after watching '13 going on 30' on a saturday night on the couch, alone in my parents' apartment. i cried and wondered why oh why doesn't mark ruffalo love ME? the second was a bit more complex. it didn't involve mark ruffalo. but i'm sorting it out.

THINGS I DIDN'T DO

- drink guiness in ireland
- smoke weed in amsterdam
- practice yoga in india
- partake in any extreeeeeme events in new zealand (well, some days hanging out with my folks were pretty extreme)

however, i DID cry AND have explosive shits in 10 countries! now THAT's impressive!

thus ends the tally.

-----

there's been some sad news since i returned. Meral's lovely dog in olympos has disappeared and is thought to have died. apparently there were some dog poisonings going on in the area. he will be very very missed! i will forever remember his slobbery face rushing towards my clean pants. and the day that i had to comb all the burrs out of his fur after dragging him through the river and bushes to evade the 2 lira charge to get to the beach. he was a top dawg. we miss you, Arab!



i'd also like to do a shout out to Wayne, who passed away last month. i was lucky enough to meet Wayne in january when i met up with Andria and Terry near melbourne (i stayed overnight at Di & Wayne's place - it was a delicious break from the banana hammocking in the hostel!). i heard that Wayne was ill but you wouldn't have known it the day i was there - he spent most of the day working in his shed, sorting and arranging his tools, and installing a massive rain barrel. their gorgeous garden was filled with his creative handywork and showed a different side of the short-shorts wearing dude and his somewhat surly character. it was a hoot of a day that i won't forget! the image of his short shorts is burned into my retinas (conveniently covered by the table in this photo) - something i'm guessing he would be proud of.


Andria, Di, Wayne & Terry - good times.

-----

and now, the final and longest shout out in the history of shout outs:

to the fine people who kept in touch with me from afar
amandamomdadjoshreesejacleahmarnieandriacheethammikekim
shannonnadenesharonbenjamincatjamielesliekelly

to the folks i met & hung out with along the way
leonaamelieangiekatrinareneegiselashaunjaviermeralkennymonicabridie
shyaamandtheintrepidindiapossekazdiwaynekatedoogiedangabesarahroyadamtim
and all the suckers i beat at shithead

i love you guys!
the end.